The music I played

Even the trees I planted

They all fade away 

A bee without stripes

A ladybird without spots

I am the square peg

Disconnected from

This everyday grey disguise 

Where do I belong? 

I miss the mountains 

I miss being someone else 

I miss not missing 

Still paying the price 

Of all the stupid mistakes 

I can’t untangle 

Autumn oak leaf green

Soft against yellow stubble 

Coming in to land 

So we’re torn apart

Like fields of endless clouds that

Burn while the sun dies

The bridges we burned

Other paths we didn’t take 

And the lakes we lost

Artificial light

Draining the life from my soul

An empty dream hole

Like silver woodlice

That roll up into a ball

Every time I touch

In windowless rooms

Drowning in your blurry eyes

And double vision 

Rooted and grounded 

Clouds hang on the lonely mount

And there is no end

Under the mountain 

In the gravel and the shale

Lie dry broken bones

On cold mountain tops

The sharp bite of morning air

Snapping me awake

Ready to set sail

Following the western sun

What tales will unfold? 

Crimson coals glowing 

Scarlet flames flicker and lick

We open old wounds

Strong September sun

Stretching out summer shadows 

So sorry so sad

Orange smoke billows 

While the evening sunflowers 

Shake their dying heads 

Under a star cloud

My perspective is restored 

I am empty space 

Have I been betrayed? 

Or cast aside and mislaid? 

Where did I go wrong? 

In the shadow of

All my baby willow trees 

I lay down my sword

Torn into pieces 

Bulldozering what we grew 

Like a rolling stone 

Retracing my steps 

All my mistakes and regrets

As the leaves turn brown